No matter what a persons circumstances are, choosing adoption is one of the hardest choices a mother (and father!) can ever make. It’s also one of the greatest choices as well, since they will be giving a family the greatest gift ever – a child. 

I found out today that I am 5 weeks pregnant, give or take a few days or so.  This baby is a product of a rape back on St. Patty’s day. And it definitely is not in the cards for me to have a third child – at least not at the present time in my life.  I know that I am not physically, emotionally, or financially able to support another child by myself.  Abortion had crossed my mind just as quickly as that second line showed up on the test this morning.  But that thought left even quicker seeing as though I could never live with myself if I went that route.

I have done research on adoption and think I have found a couple in which I’d love to be able to give this baby to.  While I haven’t met them or talked to them yet, I know in my heart that my son/daughter will have the best life possible with them.  Hopefully we will be able to talk and discuss everything that this will entail. 

Babies require a lot of work – middle of the night feedings, a lot of cuddling – especially when they’re sick, a lot of interaction between the mom and dad with the baby, doctors appointments, feeding, bathing, etc…  I barely survived the first year of both of my kids’ life that I know how hard it is to do.  I probably wouldn’t of had it not been for my mom and grandma, who I consider my true saviors.  And adding a 3rd is pushing my luck.

I just know that I need to tell my mom quickly since it’s not going to be too much longer till she notices that I’m devloping a little pooch.  And she knew I was pregnant with both of my kids before I did.  So far she hasn’t said anything to me, so either she doesn’t know yet or she’s waiting for me to tell her.  I think I’m going to move thousands of miles away and call her.  This way, I won’t be around when things get messy.

So keep tuning in for continuous updates on this journey.  My first prenatal appointment is May 14th at 10:45 am.  I will be approximately 8 weeks by then.  I will post all the details as they come to me.